karmaschild: (True Blood: You suck.)
You have been warned.

Yesterday, I bought a skirt. This might not seem like a noteworthy thing, but the last time I wore a skirt of any kind was my grandmother's funeral back in June 2006. Before that? God only knows.

Tonight, I plan to wear that skirt. Out. In public. This thought terrifies me. I don't wear skirts because I have a very firm notion in my mind that fat, ugly women do not wear skirts. Full stop. Some fat women can. Some ugly women can. But, if you are the perfect storm of fat and ugly that I am, you do not. Simple, easy to follow rule.

Rule that I am breaking, and I have no idea why. I was in the store last night trying to find a pair of dress slacks to wear to the party tonight and on my way to the fitting room, I just snagged a skirt off a display. I assumed that a) it wouldn't fit (obviously) and b) even if it did, it wouldn't work with the top I picked out. Only, the slacks didn't fit, but she skirt did. And it matched the top.

If you look at me from the front, while I'm wearing a skirt, I look fine. A little chunky and not exactly 'fetching', but not hideous. It's the profile view that gets me. My ass sticks out like one of those old fashioned bustles on antique dresses. Only mine's all fleshy and has no support wires. I am not built to wear girly shit. I've occasionally thought to myself that I should have been born a guy, because I just make a butt ugly woman.

What the hell was I thinking, buying this?

God, I hope there will be alcohol at this party.
karmaschild: (Jared accidentally all the trains)
Another one for the "occasionally, I know what I'm talking about" files: Last night I let the dogs out at about 1:30am because they actually had to go out. When [livejournal.com profile] beverly_mcintyr's dad got out of the shower at 2am, he started to let them out again. I stopped him and told him they just came in. He let them out anyway, because, "Well, they wanna go out again."

Cut to ten minutes later, he's standing in the freezing cold, shouting for Max to come in for 20-30 minutes. Because he didn't have to go out. He just wanted to play and bark and piss off the neighbors.

I don't know why I even bother trying anymore.

I have a pile of homework I need to get to work on. Class was cancelled Monday because the instructor was sick, but we got all the assignments ahead of time, so we're still responsible for the work we would have done Monday. Plus, I have twice the amount of homework for my Database Fundamentals class this week as I normally do. I really can't leave that one until the last minute.

I have just started watching "The Voice" for the first time and I'm really enjoying the show. I hate shows like American Idol where they get a bunch of poor people whose well-meaning (or just vindictive) friends and family told them they could sing, up on the stage just to humiliate them. I like that these auditions have some pre-screening. I am firmly on the side of Team Blake, since his drunken ways amuse me so. And I love watching his Twitter feed because every couple of days, he'll Tweet something that begins with, "I'm so drunk I..." and then someone will get outraged and make a stink about how they're unfollowing him. I think he does it on purpose, just to have someone to fight with.

So, I have a 20,000 word Big Bang story to work on and I haven't started yet. I feel as if I should, maybe, work that into my time budgeting somewhere. I let myself get discouraged, initially, by lukewarm mod reaction to the story idea, but I think I'll try to make myself go ahead and write it anyway. Even if I don't submit it to the challenge, it's still a story I want to write, so...

Also had a weird idea for an original story pop up that I want to write. That almost never happens, so I should take advantage while I can.

Oh, and speaking of weird ideas... the other night, I dreamed I was waitressing at some crappy restaurant and, just like my last real attempt, turned out VERY BAD at it. The thing that sticks out the most about this dream was that after I went to clear a table vacated by a particularly difficult family of customers, I discovered that my "tip" left behind was a sketch of how the restaurant should have been laid out and a note that said, "PS: Nothing and foolishness is still nothing."

I don't know what any of that means, but I woke up feeling very inadequate. :P

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Mal

August 2017

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